Down The Rabbit Hole

“"If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see?” “She generally gave herself very good advice, (though she very seldom followed it)”

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Time keeps on Moving




HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED THAT THE HARDEST CHOICES IN LIFE ARE THE ONES THAT EFFECT YOU THE MOST.

Do you ever look back on your life and say, “boy,. I wished I could have changed that, my life would be so much better.”

Granted for the most part we all think that. But I don’t want to do that for the major parts of my life. Every year about this time (when spring starts up) I begin to get depressed and think about all the things I could have changed.

Well, damnit, I am to young for that kind of thinking. There is shit in my life that I want to do and I want to enjoy. And like a well set up domino grouping if you get your shit together your dominoes will hit the next consecutive one and your dominoes will fall into place.

Side note: is Domino singular and pluralized is Dominoes? Or is it like pototo/potatos?

Life is like a complicated ballet movement… if you move every step correctly you will end up with the most beautiful routine ever… if you make the wrong move you end up breaking your damned ankle and having to sit out of the remainder of the show.

I personally want my perfect domino/dance recital.

How the hell do I do it though?

How I want my life to go:

*get a better job-to support going back to college-thinking of working for the post-office I found out from a rural carrier that they start out at $15.00 an hour, yes you do have to use your own car but they do pay for all the gas and mileage reimbursement)

*go back to college… graduate before age 30 Interest now in paralegal work

*lease to own a home while working and going to college.

*when I have graduated college work a little longer… find a terrific first time “college issued” job.

*sell leased home to move to whatever area new job is in.

How my life is working out currently:

*Shit job

*3 years of college with emphasis on psychology, sociology, and art history

*renting (although the neighbors are a riot)

Please note that not a single damn part of that had anything to do with marriage or kids (that is a later post Ms. Zan).

Continuing this post after lunch

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Trials and Tribulations of Alice

Been sick, been busy, nothing really more than that. I have had a cold for the last two weeks... it is finally working its way out of my system now.

The psycho-bitch across the street is back at home (oh joyous day for me) as well as lucretia MacEvil. Apparently her and her beau have reconciled... not without first riding themselves of the dilapidated lincoln town car with the busted shocks into the yard across the street that already is home to 3 full size vans, a nova, a corvair, impala, buick skylark, and tracker, and mercury something or nother and bought a 92 thunderbird with missing liscence plates, grille, and front bumper... Monday night Lucretia burns out 'bout midnight in the thunderchicken (which minutes later the cops go crusing by looking for the culprit of the rubber marks) and returns three hours later to throw two trashbags (full of clothes cause the trash bags kinda did this distentigrate on impact thing, and a fairly nice leather coat are all thrown out of the thunderchicken (while in gear-of course). The next day Lucretia is back across the street with psycho-bitch hanging out together (which gave them the bright idea to annoy me last November the last time they hung out together sharing the same brain). The lights in every room in the house has been on for four nights straight now. Hmmmm.... maybe rehab AND a mental institution aren't going to solve their issues.

Oh, and my new duplex neighbor... fucking Billy Badass. Yep, Billy Badass, my new neighbor... sheesh... I am stalling 'cause I gotta collect my thoughts on this guy.

Brief Summary on Billy. Billy is my landlords 22 year old adopted son. Billy was adopted at age 17 by landlord. Billy Badass and Billy Badass' Twin brother went into the army at age 18. He got out of the army in December So now I have this ungodly immature retired cannon fodder fucking up my nightly routines at home. In know all of you are thinking... oh, Alice you sexy thing don't let him bother you, he served his country... This guy drives me BONKERS! He always has his radio up so loud it shakes our living room floor, why so loud you ask? Because he has to hear his living room stereo from out in the garage where he is operating a god damn SKIL SAW! Haaa.... He brought his little dog too... acutally a REALLY big dog that will NOT stop barking at the cars or anything else for that matter that goes past our house. Last night as I was purusing through a magazine I heard this TONK TONK TONK of a hammer hitting metal... I waited for the voices to subside and retreat to the front of the dwelling... and there is a lovely green tarp hanging across the end corners of the fence. I figured he put it up for his dog since it was suppose to rain/sleet/snow in the next few days. Anyways I take MY dog out since finally he took is dog in to use the fenced in area... and to my surprise underneath the tarp is a dead gutted deer (this is 12:30 at night by the way) no wonder my dog went ape-shit and started gnawing on a hooved foot. Talking about scaring the shit out of a girl. Billy Badass came out after I had my near fatal heart attack when I came around to the front of the house to go inside and tell boy-toy what I saw.

Billy Badass's explanation of deer carcass? "I hit it in my eclipse earlier tonight when I came home from the bar... so, I decided to gut it to process it." "Hope it didn't scare you." "I was going to get a new car anyway, my check from the army should get here in a few days".

Alice's reply. "Wait till there is a horses head in your bed."

Exit stage left.

I swear to vishnu that I am getting a digital camera at some point to show you people pics of these things I speak of.

Here's Johnny!

All work and NO play really does make Alice a dull girl.