Make you Giggle!
Some computer funnies to get you through the day!
1. Compaq is considering changing the command "Press Any Key" to "Press Return Key" because of the flood of calls asking where the "Any" key is.
2. AST technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was hard to control with the dust cover on. The cover turned out to be the plastic bag the mouse was packaged in.
3. Another Dell customer called to say he couldn't get his computer to fax anything. After 40 minutes of troubleshooting, the technician discovered the man was trying to fax a piece of paper by holding it in front of the monitor screen and hitting the "Send" key.
4. Yet another Dell customer called to complain that his keyboard no longer worked. He had cleaned it by filling up his bathtub with soap and water and soaking the keyboard for a day, then removing all the keys and washing them individually.
5. A Dell technician received a call from a customer who was enraged because his computer had told him he was "Bad and an invalid." The tech explained that the computer's "bad command" and "invalid" responses shouldn't be taken personally.
6. A confused caller to IBM was having trouble printing documents. He told the technician that the computer had said it "couldn't find printer." The user had also tried turning the computer screen to face the printer-but that his computer still couldn't "see" the printer.
7. An exasperated caller to Dell Computer Tech Support couldn't get her new Dell Computer to turn on. After ensuring the computer was plugged in, the technician asked her what happened when she pushed the power button. Her response, "I pushed and pushed on this foot pedal and nothing happened."
The "foot pedal" turned out to be the computer's mouse...
8. Another customer called Compaq tech support to say her brand new computer wouldn't work. She said she unpacked the unit, plugged it in and sat there for 20 minutes waiting for something to happen. When asked what happened when
she pressed the power switch, she asked, "What power switch?"
9. Another IBM customer had trouble installing software and rang for support. "I put in the first disk, and that was OK. It said to put in the second disk, and had some problems with the disk. When it said to put in the third disk, I couldn't even fit it in..." The user hadn't realized that "Insert Disk 2" implied removing Disk 1 first.
10. A story from a Novell NetWare SysOp:
CALLER: "Hello, is this Tech Support?"
TECH: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?"
CALLER: "The cup holder on my PC is broken -and I am within my
warranty period. How do I go about getting that fixed?"
TECH: "I'm sorry, but did you say a cup holder?"
CALLER: "Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer."
TECH: "Please excuse me. If I seem a bit stumped, it's because I am. Did you receive this as part of a promotional at a trade show? How did you get this cup holder? Does it have any trademark on it?"
CALLER: "It came with my computer. I don't know anything about a promotional. It just has '4X' on it."
At this point, the Tech Rep had to mute the caller because he
couldn't stand it. He was laughing too hard.. The caller had been using the load drawer of the CD-ROM drive as a cup holder and it had snapped it off the drive.
11. A woman called the Canon help desk with a problem with her
printer. The tech asked her if she was "running it under windows." The woman responded,"No, my desk is next to the door. But that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window and his printer is working fine."
12. And last but not least:
TECH SUPPORT: "O.K. Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter "P" to bring up the Program Manager."
CUSTOMER: "I don't have a 'P'".
TECH SUPPORT: "On your keyboard, Bob."
CUSTOMER: "What do you mean?"
TECH SUPPORT: " 'P' on your keyboard, Bob."
CUSTOMER: "I'm not going to do that!"
8 Comments:
I needed that today! You know how some days you just feel like you are doing everythign wrong and you just aren't "getting it"? These stories made me feel much better. Thanks
Oh my gawd! I needed a good chuckle, thank god I popped by!
There ARE people more stupid than me out there!
YAY!
Some people are soooo stoopid.
There ought to be a firing squad for such callers.
y'all have no idea...
I worked tech support for a Dell outsource call center for 2 1/2 years, before it was decided that the techs in India would work one day for less than we made in one hour.
Best call I ever had was from a very upset young lady. She was using her sister's portable (big sis was home from college) and now was getting the message "No Operating System found"; I asked what she had been doing before the message started coming up.
She told me the last thing she did was format a floppy. Oops. Turns out she formatted the hard drive.
I have always wondered how it went when her sister came home.
I'd agree whith Kurt Booth, sometimes you really have the feeling of wanting to use the keyboard on the client, for the stupid question you get. its part of he job but still. It may be the reason why some of those cubicle toys are so popular
I didn't mean the little girl by the way. I've done the same once whith my own pc. But there isn't much one can do after a format, except to go to a person who can recover the data, but it depends on the guarnatee and on how good the technician is. If he's good enought he might be able to take the hdd out and place it back in, in such a way that it is never noticed. thats the catch.
as for really going after a client whith keyboard, not really, just reacted off the frustration in a computer game
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